Dear Mama…

          Perhaps one of my most favorite songs of all time is Tupac’s “Dear Mama”. This is because it not only showcases Pac’s timeless style, it also describes a mother very much like mine.

      I’m not gonna lie that my mum and I have been best friends all my life. Thing is, we’re as different as night and day. Growing up we had a very turbulent relationship. This was most likely because we kept trying to transform each other into what we thought was the ideal mother/daughter. 

    My mum kept trying to transform me into a traditional Yoruba female and I always wondered why she couldn’t be like those cool moms they showed on TV ( I blame American cable).

     I was the only female and as such, my mum had this idea of what she wanted me to be like. All that mother-daughter parenting power was focused on me and I didn’t like it one bit.

     I challenged all the cultural ideals that my mum held dear. I didn’t understand why I had to cook while my brothers sat on their butts and why I couldn’t jump in through windows like they did. My mum was at her wit’s end.

    The poor woman was not equipped to handle such a one as me and we quickly developed a pain in the backside relationship, figuratively for her and literally for me.

    My mum was also viewed by my brothers and I as a party pooper. When dad arrived from his trips with truck loads of cookies, mum would dish em out in ones and twos. When dad would buy us snickers and “sun top” for school lunch, mum would make Macaroni (We hated Macaroni).

   The worst part was the black and bitter “amala”, from the horrible Yam flour that was sold in Kaduna back then, that mum insisted on making. That “amala” almost ruined “amala” for me.

    Eventually though, I grew up. I realized that my mum only wanted the best for me. She was trying to raise me the best way she knew how.

    We started to understand each other and appreciate our differences and the results were amazing. She grew to become much more than my mum. She became a sister. She became a friend.

   Truth is, my mum is an amazing person and everyone who knows her can attest to this. She leaves a positive mark wherever she goes and she has a space in her heart for everyone, no matter their status in life. She’s even more popular than me! (I call her SUG President)

     My mother is unselfish, she’s strong, she’s forgiving and she has relentlessly continued to make lemonade no matter how sour the lemons that life might hand her. She always has a smile and a hug waiting and what homecoming could be better than that.

    It’s my mum’s birthday this week and this is a tribute to her. This goes out to you Mama. Ever ready clipper of my wings, avid kicker of my butt. Causer and subsequent wiper of my tears.

   As you celebrate your birthday, I wish you many more years in peace, good health and harmony. I’m blessed to have you. Happy Birthday Mommy. Love you to teeny tiny bits.

Angels Amongst Us…

      I met my first angel when I was 6 years old. He was perfect. His presence brought so much happiness and joy and everything he did was a wonder to everyone.

      This angel was my baby brother Duro. He liked to eat raw onions and he perpetually smelled of them. He liked to kiss our dogs and once challenged our “Ileya” ram to a contest. My mum saved him just in time, before the ram could obliterate him off the face of the earth. 

      He liked to put pebbles in my dad’s car tires and whenever dad was going out, he’d run out to hear how they’d sound and he just could never understand the concept of a revolving fan. The poor fan didn’t live to tell the story.

      I took Duro to class on his first day of school and when it was time for me to leave, his lil face crumpled and tears filled his eyes. It broke my heart.

    All of us will agree that children are angels(Well, most of them at least). They instantly light up your day and give you something to look forward to. 

     I personally believe that God knew how crazy our world would be and so he gave us children to compensate. And that’s why their perfect lil smiles warm our hearts and hearing that tiny “I wuv you”, or in the case of my niece Tomi, “I lob you”, makes all the difference in the world.

     The children of the world are suffering. They are faced with starvation and disease and are exposed to sexual predators and murderers. These angels are now being neglected and abused.

     In Zamfara State of Nigeria, hundreds of children are dying of lead poisoning due to gold mining activities. A sum of about 600 million naira is needed for a cleanup. This amount is not forthcoming from the Nigerian government.

    They would rather spend 16 billion naira on an official residence than save hundreds of dying children. The great Nelson Mandela once said ” There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.” I wonder what hope there is for Nigeria if we continue like this.

    It is our individual and collective responsibility as a nation to take care of our children and not just those related to us. Show love to a child today. By so doing, you are loving an angel and touching the very heart of God.

 

P.S: (I would like to apologize to my lil brother Timi, I really tried to describe you as an angel, I just couldn’t find the words.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Happy New Year…

It’s been a while since I’ve written. Let’s just say I’ve had a lot on my plate. It’s 2013 now and we all started the year with new plans, goals and expectations. However, not many of us thought to look back.
.   The only difference between this year and last is the change in the last figure. If you made mistakes last year and you didn’t find out why, you’re likely to make the same mistakes again. There’s no magic in the new year. You have to create the magic yourself.
.  .  I had a lot of complaints about 2012. I even went as far as saying it was a hard year. Then I looked back and I realized how much I had to be grateful for.
.  . In 2012, I was in law school and I found it tasking. Then I thought of how long I had waited to get in and of all the people who couldn’t afford to go to law school and of all those whose lifelong dream it was to study law but who couldn’t.
.  . In 2012, I made about six trips to and from Abuja by air and I’m still here, alive and in one piece. I remember those who made that trip once on the 3rd of June 2012 and never saw the light of day again.
.  . In 2012, God blessed me with people who surrounded me with more love& laughter than I could imagine or hope for. I might be all alone in a new place now but I’m glad I had the chance to feel that.
.  . In 2012, after spending most of my life in school, I finally qualified as a lawyer. It’s a gift I’ll be grateful for for the rest of my life.
.  . In 2012, I started my youth service. NYSC sucks and I was traumatized in demoralization camp but despite getting sent to the bush capital of the world, I realize that some people wait years and years to serve and so I, albeit grudgingly, appreciate the opportunity.
.  . Most importantly, I got out of 2012 alive and with my family and friends intact and for this I am most grateful.
.  . My point is, your life may not be everything you want it to be right now but you have life. You have the opportunity to hope, believe and dream. It is a priceless gift and should be treated as such.
.  . So as you look forward to the best of this year, don’t forget to look back and be grateful for the best of last year. I hope that this year, all our dreams come true. God bless. Happy New Year.